Monday, September 25, 2006
Juggernaut, Bitch!: Judgement Day
If you missed the original Juggernaut, Bitch!, you suck at life. Go watch it and try to improve the quality of your life: Click Here
Saturday, September 23, 2006
Things 3: Revenge of the Things
http://www.grasshopper.com/mind-games/brain-yoga/
Entrainment. Is it for real? I really have no clue. I downloaded the Digital Expresso track from grasshopper a while ago. The first time I tried it, I saw a significant difference, but I think I built up a tolerance to it. I haven't tried the newest one yet, which is called Brain Yoga. It's 30 minutes, so I suppose it must be pretty intense. I listened to a brief clip, and it sounded kind of cool, though I don't know if I'd be able to sit through it for 30 minutes in total silence.
Thing 9:
Spongebob Squarepants is messed up. It's supposed to be a kids' show, but a lot of those jokes would go over little kids' heads. Plus, there was that one episode where Spongebob and Patrick went on a panty raid with Mr. Krabs. Not exactly G-rated material in my opinion. Especially considering they went to Mr. Krabs' mother's house without telling him, which just screams creepy old lady fetish. Which brings me to my next point:
Thing 10:
Spongebob and Patrick are not gay. They're just really close friends. Same goes for Sam and Frodo from Lord of the Rings. It's sad that our society has degenerated to the point that 2 guys can't be that close without being assumed to be gay. I for one am secure in my sexuality.
Brief tangent story: At the end of last semester, my arch-nemesis and I knew we wouldn't see each other for months, so before parting ways, we shared a purely heterosexual hug. I'm sure it looked gay as hell, especially considering that it lasted like 30 seconds, but I don't care. I'm straight, he's straight. Anyone who says otherwise is either just really ignorant or a homophobe.
Thing 11:
Schunk, if you're reading this, I just want to make sure. You are straight, right?
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
Things 2: Son of Things
My fan irritates me. It does its job of cooling the room well enough, but I can't use it at night because it's too loud and I can't sleep. See, most fans would have at around 3 settings: off, low, and high. Supposedly, my fan is intended to have those as well, but it does not. It has 3 different settings instead which are mislabelled. The settings read Off, Low, and High, but in reality the settings are (in the same order) Off, High, Category 4. Category 4 is capable of blowing thing off the desks of my roommates. Quite impressive considering there's a solid wall between us. Still, not very useful at night when I want to cool the room off and go to bed around the same time.
Thing 7:
Boogeyman Released. That's right. The only guy left on Smackdown that I like (who really wasn't even on Smackdown since he's been injured for months) has been released. What the hell is WWE doing? It was bad enough when they released Kurt Angle a couple weeks ago, and just this past week Trish Stratus retired. Now the Boogeyman is gone. At this point, all my favorite wrestlers are either on RAW or ECW. Unless Bobby Lashley pulls a title victory out of his ass soon, Smackdown is not worth watching anymore.
More things later possibly. I need sleep now.
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
Things
Thing 1:
Yesterday, for reasons unknown, the normal butter packets were replaced with little butter flowers. Little chunks of butter carved to shape like flowers. What the flying fuck was the thought process behind that decision? "Hey, here's an idea: Let's take the normal butter that we have now and replace it with little sticky chunks of butter that are simultaneously too soft to pick up with your hand and too hard to effectively spread on bread. Why would we do that? Why, because I like flowers, of course." You know, it's bad enough they put all the butter in the bagel area so I have to go back there whenever I eat anything that needs butter. Now they did this? Who cares what the butter looks like, anyway? It's butter. It's essentially solid processed milkfat and cholesterol. If you can get past the idea that eating it can cause bad things to happen to your heart, then you shouldn't care much about what it looks like.
Thankfully, it seems the dining hall folks saw the error of their ways, as today the regular butter packets have returned. Good call there. I've always thought individual servings of butter should be individually wrapped as well, and now all is right with the world.
Thing 2:
I learned a new term from an online acquaintance: sabre rattling. Apparently, it's like trash talk before a sporting event. I feel smarter for that now. Rakk, if you're reading this, thanks again.
Thing 3:
I just got Guitar Hero. Yeah, I know, I'm like a year late, and I still payed full price. I'm now flat broke and owe my roomate $25ish. Go ahead, laugh at my stupidity.
Thing 4:
I promised I'd talk about this, so he we go. This past Saturday, my arch nemesis and his accomplice had concocted a diabolical plan. Something they called "Eating Good and Catching Z's." However, it seemed there was a flaw in their plan. It occurred to them too late that going out to Applebees by themselves would look gay. So, they asked me if I wanted to join them. Now, I really wasn't fond of the idea. Aside from the fact that I abhor normal healthy human interaction, I had already eaten earlier that evening. However, I figured it would be a good opportunity to keep a closer eye on the dastardly duo, so I agreed to go along.
Overall, the night was okay. Big Guy had some wings and steak, and I just had some stuff off the sampler platter. I don't remember what Schunk had and don't really care. He made a point of mocking my affinity for banana mango smoothies. I purposely refused to finish my quesadilla just to spite him. Well, really, it was half to spite him, and half because it was a lousy quesadilla. At the end of the meal, Schunk agreed to pay and have Big Guy pay him back if I would get the tip. It came out to be $7, but I only had 4 ones, so I had to pay the remaining $3 in change. I'm just giving Schunk ammunition now, aren't I?
Oh, and there's one last thing that is really just part of the dinner story, but it's special enough to have it's own thing:
Thing 5:
On the way home, the conversation somehow turned to school and majors. At that time, Schunk delivered a question that was so far off the beaten path that I was rendered speechless. It's in my AIM Buddy Info now, and will probably be there for quite some time. If you haven't read it yet, the question was as follows:
"What are you majoring in Dannyboy? Terrorism?"
Now, for those of you living outside the loop, the running gag behind this is that Schunk has accused me on several occasions of being a terrorist. However, he hasn't brought it up in quite a while, which threw me. Now, of course his accusations are totally baseless, as always.
Well, I'd like to comment further, but I have to go blow up a mosque now, so I guess I'm signing off for now. Thanks for reading, and Death to America.
Friday, September 15, 2006
Pointless Update
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Monday, September 11, 2006
Megapost: The Ultimate Stupidity of Man
“I don’t care. If you’re too sensitive to handle the opinions of another human being, you shouldn’t be on the internet in the first place.”
Before I get into the heart of the matter at hand, I have something important to get off my chest. This is an important message to the makers of Visual C++: You are retarded. You throw in all kinds of buttons that anyone with any programming experience at all will never use. You give me multiple options for just how I want to compile or debug my program, when I really only need two: compile and debug. Hell, you even set up this thing at the bottom that automatically shows where in the code you can find reference to whatever object I have highlighted. I have no use for such a thing, though I can see how you’d think someone would. Yet somehow, amongst all these fabulously overabundant buttons and menus, the rather rudimentary idea of including a “run” button to test the output of the program never occurred to you. What the fuck do you think I’ve been writing the program for? I want to run the damn thing, you fucking idiots. And no, I don’t count a “start without debug” option hidden halfway down the debug menu to be a button. I didn’t even know that option was there, let alone what the hell it did, until I went on the help site and someone was nice enough to point it out. How stupid does someone have to be to put in so many superfluous build and debug options that no one will use half of them, yet the concept of simply running the program you just wrote doesn’t cross your mind? I beg of you, please either kill yourselves or get circumcised. We can’t have pond scum like you mucking up the gene pool.
While I’m sure that seemed completely random, it actually ties in with the main topic of today’s super-sized post. In case everyone you have every known in your entire life didn’t already tell you, today is the anniversary of September 11th, 2001, the day that two Boeing aircraft crashed into the World Trade Center, another into the Pentagon, and one more crashed out in a field in Pennsylvania or something, but no one talks about that one much. It was a sad day, indeed. Many people lost their lives, and today we take time out of our day to remember them.
However, that is not the reason I am talking about this. You see, September the 11th has a special significance for me. For a long time, it meant the same to me as it must to everyone else: a terrible tragedy which we should never forget. However, about a year ago this day took on a whole new meaning for me. I was browsing about on the internets, as I often do, and I stumbled upon something called “The 9/11 Conspiracy Theory”. Now, at first I thought, “Wha? Someone doesn’t think it was a terrible tragedy?” However, the real matter here was far more sinister than something like not caring about loss of human life. I’m used to the idea of some people simply not caring about others, but this thing was rather new to me. There was apparently this theory going around that perhaps the 9/11 hijackings weren’t what we all thought they were. Though there have been different versions of this, I think the prevailing one is that the hijackings were orchestrated by the
Obviously, for every argument, there’s a counter-argument saying that the first argument is wrong. Typically, both sides present evidence to support their own claims, or debunk the claims of the opposing side. While arguments such as these don’t usually have a “winner,” as the losing side usually refuses to give up their view despite being obviously wrong, the evidence presented tends to point toward one party being right and one being wrong, or perhaps in some instances to both being wrong.
Unfortunately, this is not how the debate over this issue went down. No, the debate actually went down in such a way that it actually warped my entire paradigm of thought to the point that I couldn’t look a fellow human being the face for days.
First off, if you’d like to see the arguments yourself, they are available on the internet in a variety of places, but wikipedia seems to have the most complete compilation. Plus, they have links to other sources at the bottom of the page.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/9/11_conspiracy_theories
Now, let’s examine a couple of pieces of evidence that come up a lot.
1)
The video evidence showing an object hitting the pentagon at high speed. Both sides attempted to use this as a way to support their side. The anti-conspiracy guys claimed that this was evidence that there was no conspiracy, which is total bullshit. It has been claimed that the government seized all video evidence to cover up their diabolical scheme, so why would they release this video to the public, the anti-conspirators ask? Well, I have a fairly simple answer to that: because you can’t tell shit from that video. All you get is one frame where to can almost see the tip of the object. That’s also used by the pro-conspirators. They claim they can tell by looking at that tip of the object that it is a missile, or at least can conclusively prove that it wasn’t a passenger jet. That is also bullshit. Like I said, you can’t tell anything from the video. So, you can see why I have a hard time taking sides on the matter. Supporters of both sides are talking out of their asses. They claim to have the answers, but they’re really just full of it, and I have no way of knowing which of them, if either, is right.
2)
Wow, that's a big image. Anyone on dialup should be sure to open that in a different window.
The aftermath of the explosion, depicted in photos of the crash site. First off, they have the gaping hole in the wall of the pentagon. First strike goes to pro-conspirators: they say it was a missile because you can clearly see that the windows surrounding the hole aren’t broken. Really, in that photo above, they sure as hell look broken to me, but that's really not the most reliable evidence. As far as I can tell, the photo was taken with a telephoto lens from somewhere in
3)
The debris. Probably the best pro-conspiracy argument, though that’s really not saying much. They wonder, if a huge jet really crashed here, why don’t we see a huge mangled fuselage in any of the photos? I don't really have a good rebuttal for that one.
However, the part that really gets me is the argument over the pieces they do find.
There's a photo showing a piece of an engine. The anti-conspirators took one look at it and said “Yes, that’s definitely a Boeing engine.” The pros looked at it and said, “You can tell from the design, that’s not an engine from a Boeing.” They then show photos of a Boeing engine for comparison, which you still can’t tell shit from since the piece of engine in question is charred beyond recognition. Again, do you see the dilemma? Two people look at the exact same photograph, but say they see two different things.
There is no #4. If you see the number 4 appear on the list, it means the code got screwed up somehow and I'm too lazy and inexperienced to fix it.
So, what does this mean? Obviously, it means that at least one of them, if not both, is full of shit. However, the magnitude of the shit could be worse than you thought. I almost hope there is a conspiracy being covered up here, because blatant lying is probably the best case scenario at this point, as far as my faith in the government, and humanity in general, goes.
Allow me to explain. When someone is wrong, it can typically be for one of three reasons:
1) The Bold-Faced Lie. The person in question knows what they said is wrong, but are lying to your face to deceive you. It’s crooked and underhanded, but I think it beats the opposite end of the spectrum.
2) The Save-Face Lie. I made that term up, and plan to copyright it. This is when they don’t know what they are talking about, but they try to bullshit their way through it to make you think they know what they are talking about. I am inclined to like this scenario better. It’s really a hard decision: would you rather have your government be deceitful and corrupt, or just have no clue what the fuck they’re doing? However, it’s safe to say I’d gladly take either of those over the last one:
3) The Confused Bigot. This is when they aren’t lying at all. They honestly believe that they are right, even though they are clearly wrong. They often ignore evidence and logic alike to support their point of view, and really have no place among sentient human society.
4)
Number 3 is my ultimate fear. Well, technically my ultimate fear is having my erect penis split in half directly down the middle with a sharp object, but that’s beside the point. My next to ultimate fear is the fear of having to deal with a number 3.
In fact, I honestly believe I will die in an argument with a number 3. I will show them evidence of why they are wrong, but they will disregard it without justification. I will rebut their counterpoints, and they will just get red in the face and state their counterpoints louder. I will start to lose my patience and hit them with a chain of logic and evidence that surely no one can resist. Then, they will respond by saying something in their defense that does not defend them in any way. They will use a chain of logic of their own that is so flawed that it’s utterance would make the ground shift from the sudden force of every thinking man in the history of the world turning over in his grave. They would utter this phrase that is so stupid, I cannot imagine it yet.
Surely, upon hearing this blasphemy against all things rational, my mind will collapse like a piece of rotten fruit. My jaw will drop so hard in disbelief that it will come unhinged. My eyeballs will pop clear out their sockets. Blood will spray out of my ears and nose like someone just turned on a faucet. My entire body will spontaneously combust. Then, finally, in an unearthly scream of pure agony, my head will explode like that guy from Scanners, sending chunks of skull and meat and gray matter all over the place, leaving nothing but a cauterized stump where my head should be. Finally, my bloody smoldering carcass will collapse to the ground, utterly defeated by the ultimate stupidity of man.
Thursday, September 07, 2006
Erratic Update/Harrowing Tale: I got my PS2 back.
I lent my PS2 to my friend/arch nemesis. I didn't have a tv, and figured he could get better use out of it than me. I was being quite generous, considering Schunk has a track record of being untrustworthy, brash, reckless, and kind of a dick. Still, I somehow in the back of my mind thought I was going to get it back in time for my birthday trip home (which is this Saturday, by the way)
I talked with him on AIM a bit earlier this week, and it was obvious he didn't want to give it up. So, I devised a scheme to get it back. While he was away at practice or something, I was going to sneak into the room and retrieve the console, along with the game I lent him. (which I still own him in)
However, it was not to be. You see, I'm not the 1337 ninja I make myself out to be. Though I can get into Benoit House on my own with ease, opening the door to Schunk's room is a little beyond my skill set. So, I figured I'd get a co-conspirator: Schunk's roomate, and my former roomate, whom we will refer to as Big Guy, because his real name is wholy uninteresting.
The following AIM conversation is real. Only the name has been changed to protect the guilty. I'll let it speak for itself.
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A few moments later, I had this conversation with Schunk:
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Yes, Big Guy betrayed my trust and told Schunk all about it. I was as shocked and apalled as you probably are now.
Naturally, I couldn't let this stand. After I got back to my room that night after dinner, I sent Schunk a final ultimatum. At least, I was going to, until he decided to draw out the cat and mouse game even further.
(When you're reading this, keep in mind that I don't believe a word he's saying. I'm playing along to test his mettle and call his bluff, and he in turn stands strong. This is how arch nemeses interact)
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And I did, indeed. Believe me, as much as I enjoy his antics, I'm not one to play cat and mouse all day. It was time to reclaim what was rightfully mine. (Holy crap, that sounded corny. My apologies) I went directly over to his room. The fool left it unlocked, but he wasn't alone. It turns out he was playing FIFA on the PS2 at that very moment. Well, I'm not one to back down. I told him why I was there. He naturally tried to continue with his evasive antics. I put up with it for a few minutes, but quickly tired of it. I stood my ground and laid down the law. Finally, after much cajolling (did I spell that right?), he caved when I called his final bluff. He said that Trey had a PS2, just not the power cord. He said he'd give the PS2 back if he could just keep the cord. Much to his dismay, I agreed. I got the PS2 back, and on top of that, managed to erode his mettle enough to get the power cord as well.
So, despite many perils, I won the day, and have the prize in my possession. And yet, the story is not over. This is but the end of a chapter in a long book. You see, our last Tag Team Title match was left undecided, and I plan to bring the titles back home where they belong, be it in SD!vs.RAW 2006, or SD!vs.RAW 2007. To paraphrase my worthy nemesis:
"Whatcha gonna do, brother?! Whatcha gonna do when Dannyboymania runs wild on you?!?!?!"