Re: Personal problems

I really don't like to write things here about my personal life if I can help it. The obvious exceptions are anecdotes that I think might be funny or at least enjoyable by someone. Of course, most of my life isn't that interesting, and so I have relatively little to write here. However, I feel tonight should break with tradition, if only to let people know what's going on.

To put it simply, I've been having a rough sort of depression relapse. I'm having a very hard time finding the will to even get out of bed in the morning. I think it's hard to describe to someone who hasn't experienced it, but suffice to say it's pretty amazing I haven't killed myself yet. I'm sure I have something to live for, but I'll be damned if I can think of what it is.

So, it's starting to look like I might be taking a break from school. I don't know yet what's going to happen, but it's fairly certain that I'm not graduating in May at this rate. So, I guess I don't know what's next for me. I'm getting some blood work done tomorrow, going to see a new doctor, maybe get some counseling. Other than that, it's a mystery.

Really, I hate this. I know how this must look to most people, and I feel totally pathetic, but this mess has gotten out of control. I'm not just depressed; there is something clinically wrong with me. Nobody should feel this way all the time for no reason.

Anyway, I'm hoping I'll find a way to turn this into something good. If I end up taking some time off, I'll try to make the most of it, either writing or drawing. I don't know, I just don't want to waste my damn life forever. In the meantime, though, I guess I'm sitting in front of the computer like an ass playing Castle Age and growing a beard. Could be worse, I guess. I could be playing World of Warcraft.

Still not dead yet

Just so you know. School starts in about a week. I'll probably blog about that. Also, started work on my webcomic, though I'm still struggling with the fact that I can't draw my way out of a paper bag, yet am too much of a perfectionist to trust the project with anyone else. More on this later, plus, could the breakfast cereal you've been eating to get more fiber actually kill you? Find out tonight at 11.

Welcome

I don't know if anyone's noticed, but I've been adding a lot to my greeting line thing on the top of the page. Right now, there are 41 random greetings you can get. Seen them all yet? Of course not, because odds are you're Jordan and you like to disable javascript with browser add-ons, you friggin' spoil-sport you.

By the way, I'm working on an idea I had for an online browser-based game. The main obstacle right now is that I don't have a dedicated web server to use. At least, not one with enough bandwidth and whatnot. If anyone can suggest a good solution for this problem, I'm all ears.

More on this story as it develops, or fails to do so.

P.S. Random post tags are random.

Stuff

Sorry for the lack of posts. It's my vacation, you know? Pretty uneventful. Sleep, eat, lounge and watch tv, rinse, repeat. A few things happened, though. Here are the good bits:

I did get out to that George Thorogood concert after all. It was a lot of fun. I think my dad had a good time, too. We both noticed he was younger than anyone in the band. What's funny is, George is old as dirt, but he still thinks he's hot stuff. He's entertaining, though, I'll say that.

Also, I finally got to see Pineapple Express. It was about what I expected, but I enjoyed it. I'm not sure how that one guy didn't die though. Didn't he get shot like seven times?

And, I picked up my copy of Dead Rising: Chop Til You Drop. To be honest, I'm kind of underwhelmed so far. I mean, I'm only a couple hours into it, but I was kind of hoping for more, considering all the hype the original got. My mini-review will get its own post in a minute.

Lastly, I might have found a place for the SUNYIT Paranormal Investigators to visit this spring. Fingers crossed, eh?

That'll do it for now. Peace and Love.