Cleaning another skeleton out of my closet

Just something I needed to get off my chest.

So, I came this close to having an honest-to-god girlfriend this summer. This friend of my sister's had been joking that she wanted to go out with me. This was even before she met me, but once we did meet, she kept it up. As this went on, it soon seemed she wasn't joking.

Anyway, we ended up going on sort of a fau date at the county fair. Though we didn't get to spend a lot of time alone, we had fun, and it seemed like she really was interested in me. I wasn't sure if I was interested or not at the time, but I was up for it.

Well, we ended up heading home in the van. Most of the other people were toward the front, and we were sitting alone together in the back in the dark, holding hands, making nice, etc. Nothing too serious, but definitely farther than most people go on a first date.

The thing that makes this kind of weird for me is that, well, aside from the fact that she's underage (and ungodly hot for her age), she's basically my first kiss, unless you count that thing in 3rd grade (a story I refuse to get into for the sake of my sanity). Essentially, this is the first girl who's shown me any kind of affection, beyond simple friendship. This had a weird effect on my psyche. I found myself thinking about her a lot, and I even dreamed about her once.

Anyway, things took a sour turn when I started to realize why all this was too good to be true. The reason she was affectionate toward me is because she's like that with pretty much all guys, and she's dated guys way older than me, too. In fact, while she was on vacation in Rhode Island with my sister, I found out she got phone calls from 8 different guys.

So, to sum up, she wasn't really into me. She just likes guys in general. She has her own man-harem. A man-agerie, if you will. So, once I found out that she was definitely seeing one of these other guys again, I decided to let things fizzle out quietly so we could just go back to being friends. I think she kind of feels the same way, but in case she doesn't, I'm trying now to avoid any social situations in which we would end up alone together. I originally wanted to get her alone and talk about it, but looking back on it, I think that just would've made things harder.

So, yeah. I'm a lonely mo-fo who just had another awkward relationship with another slutty underaged girl who really wasn't into me in the first place. On the bright side, I think this one actually lasted longer than a week, and to my knowledge, she doesn't have a criminal record. So, at least it's a step in the right direction in that respect.