Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Things

I've been busy with homework stuff, so now I'm all backed up with stuff from the past couple days. So, let's go through this one at a time, and hopefully not dwell on any one thing for too long.

Thing 1:

Yesterday, for reasons unknown, the normal butter packets were replaced with little butter flowers. Little chunks of butter carved to shape like flowers. What the flying fuck was the thought process behind that decision? "Hey, here's an idea: Let's take the normal butter that we have now and replace it with little sticky chunks of butter that are simultaneously too soft to pick up with your hand and too hard to effectively spread on bread. Why would we do that? Why, because I like flowers, of course." You know, it's bad enough they put all the butter in the bagel area so I have to go back there whenever I eat anything that needs butter. Now they did this? Who cares what the butter looks like, anyway? It's butter. It's essentially solid processed milkfat and cholesterol. If you can get past the idea that eating it can cause bad things to happen to your heart, then you shouldn't care much about what it looks like.

Thankfully, it seems the dining hall folks saw the error of their ways, as today the regular butter packets have returned. Good call there. I've always thought individual servings of butter should be individually wrapped as well, and now all is right with the world.

Thing 2:

I learned a new term from an online acquaintance: sabre rattling. Apparently, it's like trash talk before a sporting event. I feel smarter for that now. Rakk, if you're reading this, thanks again.

Thing 3:

I just got Guitar Hero. Yeah, I know, I'm like a year late, and I still payed full price. I'm now flat broke and owe my roomate $25ish. Go ahead, laugh at my stupidity.

Thing 4:

I promised I'd talk about this, so he we go. This past Saturday, my arch nemesis and his accomplice had concocted a diabolical plan. Something they called "Eating Good and Catching Z's." However, it seemed there was a flaw in their plan. It occurred to them too late that going out to Applebees by themselves would look gay. So, they asked me if I wanted to join them. Now, I really wasn't fond of the idea. Aside from the fact that I abhor normal healthy human interaction, I had already eaten earlier that evening. However, I figured it would be a good opportunity to keep a closer eye on the dastardly duo, so I agreed to go along.

Overall, the night was okay. Big Guy had some wings and steak, and I just had some stuff off the sampler platter. I don't remember what Schunk had and don't really care. He made a point of mocking my affinity for banana mango smoothies. I purposely refused to finish my quesadilla just to spite him. Well, really, it was half to spite him, and half because it was a lousy quesadilla. At the end of the meal, Schunk agreed to pay and have Big Guy pay him back if I would get the tip. It came out to be $7, but I only had 4 ones, so I had to pay the remaining $3 in change. I'm just giving Schunk ammunition now, aren't I?

Oh, and there's one last thing that is really just part of the dinner story, but it's special enough to have it's own thing:

Thing 5:

On the way home, the conversation somehow turned to school and majors. At that time, Schunk delivered a question that was so far off the beaten path that I was rendered speechless. It's in my AIM Buddy Info now, and will probably be there for quite some time. If you haven't read it yet, the question was as follows:

"What are you majoring in Dannyboy? Terrorism?"

Now, for those of you living outside the loop, the running gag behind this is that Schunk has accused me on several occasions of being a terrorist. However, he hasn't brought it up in quite a while, which threw me. Now, of course his accusations are totally baseless, as always.

Well, I'd like to comment further, but I have to go blow up a mosque now, so I guess I'm signing off for now. Thanks for reading, and Death to America.

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